Life.

Howdy friends,

I am truly sorry it has been such a long time, I feel quite relieved knowing I am writing again, it always feels good and I always wonder why I stopped. Once again it is just because life has been extremely busy, and I think that is the case for most people recently, I feel as if people are getting busier and busier as time goes on, which is partly what this post is about. Lately I have struggled with a lot of things, mainly mental illness issues, stress and general life but as a new chapter of my life begins I am setting some goals that I believe everyone should follow.

To give you a quick rundown, Sandhu and I are FINALLY moving into our own place on Sunday and I couldn't be more excited! I cant wait to decorate it, and there will definitely be a post on that!!
I am very busy at school and am loving it, I know it is what I want to do but it has its downsides on me personally which I will discuss further on.
Mum got some results back and overall it looks like her cancer has shrunk in various places which is fantastic. Of course we understand not to set our hopes too high, but at the same time it gives us hope and tells us to soldier on.
I recently embarked on a weight loss journey using a great programme. I love the programme and think it is fantastic but unfortunately just not for me, so I have decided to embark on a new journey (more to come)

So yeah that is an update on my life. I hope you are all well and enjoying whatever life throws at you, and if not well don't worry I completely understand..

Anyway here are my goals/life tips that I am yet to follow..


SET TIME FOR YOURSELF:

This is something I have realised today, and in fact I have learnt most of these things today. Like I said before, people are busy and I think sometimes we forget to just take time out and relax. Yes life is busy and there are a million different things that have to be done, and sure it is hard, but trust me, we must take time for ourselves. When I just power on and don't relax I get tired, angry, anxious and recently depressed. I have worked hard but in my opinion not hard enough, and then I beat myself up about it. I understand that I have to work hard, but I also now understand that if I don't take some bloody time out to focus on myself I will go mental... Literally.
So what I want to do now is.. If I am struggling with life in general, I will not give myself a hard time, I will take a few moments to remember that sometimes health is more important than things that seem important. If I have an essay due I need to realise that sure I need to do it, but I also need to get a good nights sleep. I will run myself a bath (Yes! My new house has a bath yay!), go for a walk or just lay in bed and have a quick nap.
Mental health is so important, it is one thing I really can not stress enough, so please whoever you are make sure to look after yourself.


STAND UP FOR YOURSELF AND TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS:

Recently I came across an event in my life that caused me to do it, at the time I got very worked up about it, was anxious and felt extremely guilty, but since then I have become proud of my decision, I stood up for myself in a time that what I wanted was very important for me.
Another thing is my weight loss programme. The decision to give it up has been a quick but certain one. For me I now realise that what I want from myself is not a quick fix, it is genuine health and wellbeing, and I will not achieve that by spending a lot of money on a product that does not work for me. It is a great product that has worked on thousands, but for me it hasn't done what I wanted. It has been a trial and error situation. I also felt guilty about this decision, I felt like I was letting everyone around me down, but at the end of the day I have to do what is right for me.


LOVE YOURSELF INTO SHAPE, NOT BEAT YOURSELF INTO SHAPE:

True inner happiness comes from within. Today I was discussing this with my councellor (yes I see a Councellor) and she told me the saying above. I love it, I think it is so so perfect. A fancy diet and self hatred is not going to produce inner happiness, I have to do that myself.
I have so many ideas for when I move in. I want to begin eating wholesome foods that fill me, I don't want to starve, I bloody love food for goodness sake. I want to enjoy life, enjoy food and find the passion for food and exercise that I once had. But I will not, WILL NOT push myself. I will take it a step at a time and do it my way.
Recently I have put a lot of pressure on myself. I have felt like a complete failure, felt disappointed and most of all guilty, and I hate it. I am so sick and tired of feeling these feelings, I just want to be me again.
I will always be on this roller coaster I am sure, but I need to remember that I am only human and that I should work on both my strengths and weaknesses.
School has been a big factor in this. I love it don't get me wrong, but I am constantly putting pressure on myself and if I don't measure up, I get disappointed once again. Working hard and pushing yourself is one thing, but being unhappy with yourself is another thing entirely.



For me I want to focus on little things at a time and I think having my own space will really support me in this movement.
This post has been a ramble, and for that I apologise but I just want everyone to know that you have to look after yourself, stand up for yourself and love yourself. It's a journey for everyone..

Until next time,
With love, Lucia xxxx